Connection Time for New Moms & Older Children
Reading, Playing Games, Enlist Other Parent’s Help and Babywearing
Dec 1, 2008
In the best of circumstances, finding time for one-on-one connection time, or quality time, with your children goes a long way towards having children who are self-assured, confident and generally more agreeable and cooperative. But, when the children are stressed due to the birth of a new sibling, this connection time is even more important. Unfortunately, it is difficult for a mom to find time to meet everyone’s connection time needs when the newest member of the household has such urgent needs a great deal of the time.
Here are some tips on finding time to connect with your older children when you are taking care of a new baby and recovering from childbirth.
Breastfeeding Time is Reading Time
A baby is likely to fall asleep when he is breastfeeding. Use this time to get quality, connection time with older children. Prepare ahead of time by keeping several children’s books near the usual nursing chair. Once the baby has settled into nursing, invite the older child over for story time. Some children may enjoy a chapter book, while others may be happiest with picture books.
Designate Nap Time as Game Time
If your baby will sleep in a bassinet or crib during one of his naps, use this time to play a board game or card game with an older child. Stick to short games that you can finish quickly. Games like Connect Four, Candy Land and Chutes and Ladders usually take no more than twenty minutes.
Enlist the Other Parent's Help
If you are with the children all day, enlist the other parent’s help at the end of the day. The father can take the baby for a walk or spend some time snuggling the baby while you spend one-on-one connection time with an older child. Use this time for talking, snuggling, games, reading, cooking dinner or anything your child wants to do.
Practice Babywearing
Babywearing will help you accomplish other tasks, including caring for an older child. When the baby is snuggly tucked into a ring sling or wrap, you will have your hands free to play with a sibling. Very often, a young baby will either sleep or look around contentedly when in a carrier next to his mother’s body. This gives the older child mom’s undivided attention and important connection time.
A mother often finds herself pulled in many directions when a new baby is born. Older children still have a strong need for one-on-one connection time with their mother. A mother can find ways to incorporate quality time with an older child into every day by reading while breastfeeding, playing games at nap time, taking a break from baby duty when the other parent is home and by practicing babywearing.
