Twenty years ago, cyberbullying – also called electronic bullying or eBullying – did not exist. There were fewer home computers and cellular phones, and neither text messaging nor social networking websites existed. Today's children and teens are totally at home using the new technology, but plenty of parents are less adept, and may not understand how the new technology can be misused.
Cyberbullying may involve cruel, threatening, or obscene messages and images, sent by instant message or email, posted on web pages, or sent by cell phone. Personal information about the victim might be revealed (or fabricated), and rumors spread. Sometimes bullies impersonate the victims to cause them trouble.
Anonymous Bullies and Their Victims
Children can readily identify those who jam them into lockers or call them cruel names; traditional bullies may hide their actions from adults, but they want their victims to recognize their power. Most cyberbullies, however, remain anonymous. They can strike at any time of day or night, and cannot be avoided.
An anonymous enemy can be especially stressful for a victim, whose imagination may run wild. Conversely, cyberbullying offers an outlet to youngsters too weak or too low-status to win a face-to-face confrontation. The inordinate self-esteem displayed by "pure bullies" is unlikely to be present in those who practice anonymous harassment by cell phone or internet; and while there is little data yet available, it seems that many cyberbullies are bullying victims, seeking revenge.
Prevalence of Cyberbullying
Preliminary surveys show that up to twenty per cent of students experience some sort of electronic harassment. Girls are roughly twice as likely to bully or be bullied electronically as boys, and cyberbullying peaks in eighth grade. Roughly half of preteens tell their parents if they are victims, but reporting drops rapidly as children get older. Teens will tell a friend rather than an adult. Many tell nobody at all.
Sometimes it seems difficult to distinguish genuine malice from typical, inappropriate adolescent humor; but when demeaning messages about an individual are sent to many different recipients, when they are frequent and escalate in intensity, or when they clearly are intended to cause pain, that is abuse. When the victim perceives them as hurtful and abusive, that is abuse. Anonymous messages, automatically, are abusive.
Combating Electronic Bullying
Parents must be alert to the warning signs of bullying, and keep lines of communication with their children open. They should keep computers in the common areas of their homes, and not hesitate to invade a child's privacy if that is what is needed to preserve the child's safety. Schools should be informed when children are subjected to electronic attacks, so school servers can be secured and school officials can be alert for in-school problems. Increased awareness can prompt schools to institute anti-bullying programs which also address cyberbullying.
Try to identify anonymous cyberbullies. Harassment, inappropriate language, and pornography probably violate the terms of service agreements of the websites, email providers, ISPs, and telephone companies involved, so those providers may be helpful if contacted. Gather evidence, including copies of emails, instant messages, web postings, text and picture cellular messages, etc. Threats of violence, hate speech, extortion, and child pornography violate the law, and should be reported to the police.
Both in school and at home, children and teens must be motivated to report abuse of others, not just themselves, because the damage cyberbullying does to a young person may be very severe. They must learn that cyberbullying is never funny and never justified – it is just wrong.
See also:
Bullying: Who Are the Victims?
Bullying: Who Are the Bullies?
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