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Development of Impulse Control

Dealing with Impulsive Behavior in Toddlers

Jun 9, 2008

Impulsive behavior is often the cause of other negative toddler behaviors such as hitting and toy grabbing. How can a parent help a toddler through the impulsive stage?

Merriam-Webster’s on-line dictionary defines an impulse as a sudden spontaneous inclination to some unpremeditated action. This definition fits perfectly with the impulsive behavior of the toddler years. Toddlers are spontaneous beings and most of their actions are unpremeditated. Simply put, if a toddler sees something interesting, he wants it now and will make a beeline for it.

It’s interesting to note that the popular What to Expect: The Toddler Years does not specifically address impulsive behavior. Though, it does get mentioned in passing in regards to several other toddler behavior problems.

When Does Impulse Control Develop?

Impulse control is a skill that will develop in time for children as they age. Toddlers have very little impulse control. By age four or five, most children have developed some impulse control. However, as evidenced by the teen years, children still have a long way to go to be fully in control of their impulses.

It is important for parents to remember that each child develops impulse control at his own pace and it is not helpful to compare children to one another in this regard.

Behavioral Issues Associated with Impulse Control Problems

For toddlers, the list of issues associated with impulse control problems is long. Savvy parents will recognize that the root of negative behaviors, such as hitting, kicking and toy grabbing is often a child’s inability to control impulses.

Causes of Impulse Control Issues

Most toddler impulse control issues are simply developmental. Very young children cannot resist temptation. They will eat the cake on the table and touch the fragile knick- knacks left within reach.

If a child’s impulse control issues seem excessive or he does not seem to be growing out of it, it is possible that there are other factors at play. As suggested by The Feingold Association, some children may have a sensitivity to the foods they eat. Artificial food additives, like dyes and flavorings, may cause impulsive behavior for some children.

Helping Toddlers Control Impulses

Parents need to take some active steps to help toddlers and older children who have not yet developed impulse control.

Be sure to toddler-proof your house. Toddlers love to dump drawers, explore cupboards, climb and any number of other things. Make the home environment a safe one.
When visiting others, take a quick scan of the room your toddler will be spending most of his time in. Move any fragile items to an out-of-reach shelf. Likewise, relocate anything small enough to be a choking hazard.
Be an active participant in play dates with other children. Toddlers often cannot control their impulse to grab toys or to hit. A parent should be ready to intervene before there is a problem.
Redirect a toddler away from anything that is off-limits. Verbal redirection often does not work at a young age. The parent needs to physically move the item or the toddler when there is an issue with safety or appropriateness.

Impulsive behavior is often the root cause of many other toddler behavior issues. Parents should expect a child to grow out of the impulsiveness over time, but be prepared to look for possible causes, such as food sensitivities. Take an active parenting role by toddler-proofing any place that a young child will be playing for safety and parental sanity through the impulsive years.

Sources:

What to Expect: The Toddler Years; Eisenberg, Murkoff, and Hathaway; Workman Publishing, New York; 1994.

The Feingold Association website; "Symptoms that may be Helped by the Feingold Program"; accessed June 9, 2008.

Merriam-Webster, on-line dictionary, definition for "impulse", accessed June 9, 2008

The copyright of the article Development of Impulse Control in Parenting Methods is owned by Barb Hacker. Permission to republish Development of Impulse Control in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.